Can Purell be used as lube?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
do herpes really smell.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
