Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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