You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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