Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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