I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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