we have officially lost it.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
