and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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