it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
it's like heaven, but drunker
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
