Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
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