is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize