you traded sex for a burrito?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
