I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
