Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
