Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
