That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
