Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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