I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
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My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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