Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
