There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
