Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
