Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
