I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
