He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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