people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
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u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
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That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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