my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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