census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Need sex. Gaining weight.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
