this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Randomize
