The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
MIDGETS
????
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Randomize