You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
