i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize