U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I've blown a few things in my day
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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