the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
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