Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
