physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
