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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you will always have a special place in my vag
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
