I think my vagina is haunted
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Randomize
