she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize