my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
