I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize