You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
