just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
