so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
