summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
