spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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