Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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