The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
