if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
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