We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
