i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize