No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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