Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
