she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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