I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
